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Blizz – for the Fat and Foolish. April 17, 2009

Posted by globejam in Scepticism, Woo-woo.
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Last week, I saw a full page ad for something called the Blizz Bio sculpting.  I am not giving them a link here,  Google them if you want, they know their SEO well!  

It is apparently a far infrared based treatment that supposedly removes fat and can reduce your waist-line by as much as 7 inches in a single session.  I am guessing that a session is between 30 mins – 1 hour, though there is no mention of how long a session lasts. But unless it turns out to be months long and involves dieting and exercise, I don’t see how this treatment can work at all.

As usual, with no safety regulations nor effective law enforcement, it is going to be a field day for these con men.  If somebody dies, they will just pay the cops and hush it up.  Please warn people so they don’t fall victim to this – as a franchisee or a client.

All the hallmarks of a woo-woo are there on the site.  Let me walk you through some of them:

1.  They claim a higher purpose:  

Blizz BIOMED SYSTEMS DOES NOT aim merely to sell a product or service, Blizz was created to offer people everywhere an improved way of living. 

Absolutely. We believe you.  

2.  Liberally use jargon.

There is a lot of quasi-medical jargon on the website, some of it in ALL CAPS, in the hope that it will increase the credibility of the statements.   

3.  No pain, all gain.

It is non-invasive, requires no special diet, exercise, supplements and, though they don’t mention it, quite obviously, no brains on the part of the client/guinea pig/victim.

4. Hundreds of spelling mistakes.

To quote just one paragraph from the site

Non invasive body shaping painles fat reduction,skin tightening and reshaping of specific parts of your body like stimach, waist, hips, back, thighs, arms, legs, shoulders and breast ect.is possible with Bizz Bio-Sculpting.

(highlights mine).

5.  Unnamed authoritative sources.

There are many doctors and therapists all over the world who swear by it, or so the site says.  Have you heard of the “Infrared society” of Japan?  Well, neither have I.

6.  Miracle cure.

Apart from dramatic changes to your body weight and shape it also helps you relax, increases blood circulation, detoxifies you, tones your body, makes your skin youthful and radiant, de-stresses, boosts your mood, prevents injury, cures insomnia – basically everything short of immortality.

7. Peppered with vaguely related science facts.

There is one whole page on what is Infrared, far-infrared and description of the Sun’s output.

8. Hilarious explanations.

I can’t concoct anything better than what they have written, so I will just quote:

Influenced by a ultrasound field and SPECTRAL FIR energy,watermolecule in the human body starts wagging and Shaking with high Speed. As a result,heat is produced by the friction between water molecules passing through body impedance, the SPECTRAL FIR energy produces heat and higher temperature occurs at the depth of Several millimeters under dermis with no harm tobody tissue.

Apparently this burns up the fat.  As you can see, somebody has copy-pasted bits and pieces of how a microwave oven works with other crap.  Don’t miss the capital letters in between.  I, for one, do not want to be shoved into a microwave oven, no matter what the results.

Just imagine your fat evaporating right in front of your eyes (if it is from your derriere,  you may have to settle for the smell of burning fat).  I know people use the phrase “burning fat” in a loose way, but nobody actually thinks you can stick a wick into your love handles and light a match and see the fat disappear.  Or do they?

9.  Before and after pictures that are clearly doctored (doctored! – ha! ha! get it?).

principle_img21

If these were before and after pictures for a photoshop training class, I wouldn’t mind.  Notice how every hair on the eyebrow in the after picture is exactly where it was in the before picture.

10.  Exuberant testimonials:  

I lost 9 inches around my tummy in one session and then did 10 more sessions” says Rajeshwari of Chennai.  Even assuming diminishing results at every session, she must have lost over 45 inches around the waist.  That could have only happened if she had died due to the treatment and then they cremated her!  That should surely work.

11.  Long history.

From the time of Socrates, for crying out loud!

12.  Finally, and here is the clincher.  

Anybody in the personal care and beauty treatment industry can become a franchisee!  That’s it – if you are a barber or a beautician, that would do!  

Like they say in tamil – Endha mayir pudingi vaena arambikkalaam!

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Comments»

1. padmajav - April 18, 2009

LOL!!! The last line is so typically you!!! ROF!!!

globejam - April 19, 2009

🙂

Dr.R.Vinod M.B.B.S,MD., - June 23, 2009

Hey this guy globe jam, from what he has written you dont seem to be knowledgeable on medicine,
you seem to be tagging on to popular subjects and trying to grow your popularity,
dont you understand by doing so you are ridiculing a well researched subject,
who are you, give me your identity so i can communicate to you to see reason that what you are doing is wrong, I am Dr.Vinod M.B.B.S,MD, aesthetic surgeon , a professional Doctor by your standard,, i have seen and experienced Blizz Biosculpting and also recommended to a lot of my clients,100% excellent good results,

I learn Appollo hospitals are introducing Blizz biosculpting in all their hospitals 26 in all,

you think Appolo will touch anything like that,

when you say full page in Times of India,you think an international news paper will publish anything like that without researching,

so take your posting which is surely defaming,
or go to Blizz biosculpting test them yourself and write your experience,then people can really benefit,

dont write rubbish on a subject which you know nothing,

when i read your article I am reminded of two press guys one Mr nagaimugan and associates who were blackmailing genuine businesses and publishing wrong notions with ulterior motives, but the whole group is in Jail,

i am sure you are not as bad as they are,

if you are genuine publish this in your blog also,

finally your words in a open domain ,Like they say in tamil – Endha mayir pudingi vaena arambikkalaam! ,does show you in a wrong class,

correct yourself ,intellingence should not be wasted,

i shall also report this matter to the company concerned for action,
i will even want to meet you, if you have any personal problem with the company or the world itself,

If you want any explanation on the subject i shall provide you the same,or you may get it from the company itself rather than writing like this.
I am sure it works, and I am taking the franchise myself,

regards,

R.Vinodhey one more thing did you not see the C.T Scan images of rajeswari,

it is not 9 inches in one single spot,it is a total of six reference points in one session,
your understanding seems to be zero on the subject,correct yourself ,

i would not waste writing such a rejoinder to anybody, since u seem to be intellingent also, i just wanted to correct u,

hope u change for good and take the blog out, rgds,

2. Sesh - May 26, 2009

who are you guys? You and Maami.. I am so addicted to your blogs.

globejam - May 26, 2009

I could tell you who maami is, but she’d have to kill us both :). More importantly though, I know who you are – You are reader no. 3 on my blog! Thanks for reading and I am glad you like it.

Sesh - May 26, 2009

no thanks and all. I thank you for writing and I thank you again in anticipation. I have a feeling I may soon be able to find out who you are.

3. maami - May 26, 2009

@sesh: I made my first best friend at the ripe age of 12. And it had to be globejam.

globejam - May 26, 2009

Maami, make sure you ask me lots of Koshchans next time we meet.

maami - May 26, 2009

mwah, mwah da kanna!

Sesh - May 26, 2009

Maami, going by yours and his posts, it has to be a gene mutation caused by consuming roasted corn from Elliots “Bessie” Beach that has you guys writing the way you do. Anyone else from your gang writes? padmajav?

4. JKBalaji - June 16, 2009

Landed at your blog after a few clicks on different blogs and am enjoying reading. Nice blog.

globejam - June 16, 2009

Thanks.

5. Nitin - January 9, 2010

Lol – So did this Dr.R.Vinod M.B.B.S,MD., do anything 😉 ! How stupid – Apollo…..!!!


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